Office hours, Wednesday

[vdistinctive]

Eliot had been planning to do the whole "find music and practice the guitar" thing during his office hours again, today, but his computer seemed to have another idea.

Mostly, it was refusing to play anything other than Macarthur Park.

Spring was never waiting for us, girl
It ran one step ahead
As we followed in the dance
Between the parted pages and were pressed
In love's hot, fevered iron
Like a striped pair of pants

And then when he tried to turn it off, it kept playing. Even when he turned the computer off. And unplugged it. And unplugged the speakers. And threw the whole thing onto the floor and stomped on it a few times.

MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet green icing flowing down
Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'Cause it took so long to bake it
And I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Val excitedly howling along wasn't helping.

[ooc: fun fact! This is my mother's all time favorite song. Open!]

Comments

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"Seriously? Seriously?" Hardison stood in the doorway of Eliot's office and scowled. He wasn't sure if he was talking about what had happened or how much Eliot had enjoyed it or even the mess on the floor and the damn song playing.

[Gonna be soooo slooow, but couldn't pass up the aftermath]

[vdistinctive]

"It won't shut off," Eliot growled.

Hey, just be glad this meant he hadn't had time to forward the video from yesterday to Nate and Sophie yet.

[geniuswithasmartphone]

Hardison wasn't entirely sure if Eliot knew how to forward video, so that was less of a worry.

"Probably gettin' vengeance on you for all that craziness yesterday," Hardison declared. "All that stuff you made me say when I was all outta my mind on--gremlin venom?!"

[vdistinctive]

Eliot rolled his eyes. "Stuff I made you say. Sure. It was definitely my fault you thought you were a goddamn priest."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"You deliberately asked questions to get those kinds of answers," Hardison grumped. "An' it's your fault we're even on thisjavascript:void(0); stupid island. I don't even--what the hell was that, man?!"

[vdistinctive]

"Gremlin bite," Eliot said. "Apparently. Only time I've even seen the suckers was when Val took one down at my house."

His house which was now completely gremlin free, much in the way homes with cats quickly became free of mice.

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"I know what is was," Hardison snapped. "I just--I mean, man, what the hell--in, like, a y'know, grander, existential--" He was waving his arms about and failing to finish his sentences.

[vdistinctive]

"Yeah," Eliot said. "You sorta get used to that, after awhile."

The grasping for the grander, existential meaning of things and missing.

"Though I gotta say, thinkin' you were some enthusiastic young priest? I'm guessin' there's those here who would say you got it pretty easy."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"Who ate vegetables an' hated on Hot Pockets an' thought video games an' the internet were a waste of time. Would rather be out proselytizin' or playin' b-ball with disadvantaged youth or whatever." Hardison flung his gangly limbs into a chair with a grimace. "Y'all seemed to get along well."

[vdistinctive]

"He had some sense in him," Eliot said. It was easy enough to separate the real Hardison from his gremlin-bit persona; he had plenty of practice with it with Sophie and her various 'characters'. "But mostly I was humorin' him."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"Seemed like a goody-goody to me," Hardison said, absolutely not sulking, shut up. "When he wasn't bein' all Mr. Positive An' Healthy Lifestyle to you, he was freakin' Parker out."

[vdistinctive]

"Yeah, well, she's had to deal with a lot of her people not quite bein' her people, this week." Eliot shrugged. "You were freakin' me out, too."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"I was?" Hardison asked, surprised. "I thought you liked the guy!"

And, yes, Parker would be getting a ton of apology!chocolates for all the distress she'd been put through, even if, technically, none of i t was his fault. Still--she was his girl and she'd been upset. Who cared about blame in the face of that?

[vdistinctive]

"I like you, you idiot," Eliot said.

Not almost-sort-of-pod-Hardison. Even if he had better habits.

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"Well, y'all seemed to just get along super-great," Hardison grumbled, trying not to smile at the declaration there. "Didn't seem all that freaked out."

Eliot liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiked hiiiiiiiiiiim.

[vdistinctive]

Eliot would have liked to think that was obvious, but, you know. He'd met himself, so.

"Man, I was playin' along to keep you from runnin' off and doin' something stupid."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

He knew! But it wasn't like Eliot went out of his way to say or anything.

"Oooh, like what? Preach about charity? Do good works? Father Goody Two Shoes didn't seem like the type to do somethin' stupid."

Unlike, say, Hardison.

[vdistinctive]

"Not believe in the alot bearin' down on him and get trampled?" Eliot offered. "Get his ass bit by another gremlin?"

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"Don't the alots live out in the woods? Man, why would he go visit there? Proselytize to the trees?"

...The gremlins thing he had no defense for.

[vdistinctive]

"We live in Fandom. I ain't discounting a damn thing."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"If anything, he'd run into the alot of stairs," Hardison grumbled. "Or the alot of sanctimoniousness."

Hardison didn't like his alter-ego. FYI.

"Says something when I'm actually gonna be glad to head to the CMAs tomorrow."

[vdistinctive]

"'Course you're glad. It's gonna be a damn good time," Eliot said. "You can go the whole nine yards, and I'll beat up all the guys who want to punch you for bein' obnoxious."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

That earned him a giant grin. "You just like punchin' people," Hardison accused half-heartedly.

[vdistinctive]

"Well yeah. If I didn't enjoy it, I wouldn't do it so well."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"So, you're just gonna let me be an asshole so you can get into all those fights you ain't gettin' on the island," Hardison drawled. "I'm onto you."

[vdistinctive]

"I know you're not tryin' to tell me you're not gonna be an asshole about it," Eliot said. "I'm just makin' the best of the situation."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"Maybe I was plannin' on bein' good, givin' this a try, tryna see if I can discover what it is about this event that makes you happy?"

Hint: He had not been planning this, no.

[vdistinctive]

"You remember the part where I've known you for more'n half a decade, right?"

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"Maybe being a priest gave me a new outlook on life. I'm tryna be a holier, better person."

Not laughing hurt.

[vdistinctive]

"I will beat you up myself if that's true."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"Violence, my son, is never the answer," Hardison intoned.

[vdistinctive]

"You almost got it right," Eliot said. "Hang on, let me find you a napkin."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"My collar is fine, thanks," Hardison said, rolling his eyes. "So...wanted to check on a thing. From yesterday. I'm figurin' it was just a thing to try to minimize confusion an' whatever. An', if so, that's like, cool, just sayin'."

[vdistinctive]

Eliot raised an eyebrow, gesturing for him to go on.

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"You were throwin' out some terms there. Mighta even been considered labels."

[vdistinctive]

"What, that church stuff?"

Yeah, Eliot knew that wasn't what Hardison meant.

[geniuswithasmartphone]

And Hardison knew he knew, which was why he was just giving him a look. "Is that your way of sayin' drop it?"

[vdistinctive]

Eliot shrugged, a little more aggressively than necessary. He didn't want to reject the labels, but -- "I dunno, man, I was tryin' to shock you outta it or somethin'."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"That's what I was checkin'," Hardison said, leaning back in his chair. "Done for effect then. Like I said, s'cool."

He could slowplay it far longer than Eliot could, after all.

[vdistinctive]

"Yeah," Eliot said. Then: "I dunno. I guess -- maybe I'm sorta -- tryin' it out. It still sounds weird, but."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"No pressure here," Hardison said mildly. "I was just checkin' in. You know you ain't gotta do anythin' you ain't comfortable with."

EXCEPT TO ACCEPT YOU WILL BE LOVED FOREVER.

DEAL WITH IT.