What, was &quot;Rudy&quot; on cable last night?

"I don't feel like I'm hungover," the woman said, folding her legs up into a yoga-position that would seem to indicate that at least her part of last night would have been flexible. "Or bad or concussed or anything." Thoughtfully, she added, "And I don't know my name, but I know I like chocolate. And I don't know anyone's name." So this was weird. But not really bad-weird, so. "Maybe there's I.D. around?"

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The puppy wagged her tail a little more hesitantly. Eliot crouched down and checked her tags. "Well, this one's named Valentine, apparently." She licked his chin. "And is either very friendly, or has at least met me before."

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"Uhhh...yeah," he said, having some difficulty in pulling his eyes away from the flexibility on display. And her confession of liking chocolate. Because he had this joke that was more of a come on...

He was definitely into flexibility, good to know. And also the line of the guy's back as he crouched over the dog. Okay, it was possible that these two people had been made to order to appeal to him because...damn. He surreptitiously slid a pillow into his lap.

"So, nobody remembers nothin', huh? Seems like somethin' out of a movie somewhere."

The genre to be determined by what came next.

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"Valentine." She tried it out, then shrugged. "Nope, don't recognize it... like everything else." She leaned back on her hands, considering. "I don't see any cameras?" She gave the guy a small grin. "Fantasy or mystery?"

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"Reasonably certain there's at least one porn that starts this way," he noted. He straightened up and started scanning the room. "This doesn't look like a hotel." He opened a few drawers. "Got at least three distinctive fashion senses in here."

So either someone prepared for the three of them to be here, or the person who's place this was had very eclectic taste.

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"I will take porn, fantasy, or mystery over some of the other options," he said.

He didn't want to think about horror movies that started with three amnesiac naked people waking up together, thanks.

"An' three different sizes as well," he said, getting up and looking over the other guy's shoulder. He had the weirdest desire to rest his chin on his head but figured that might be pushing it. "Same with shoes sizes."

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He closed his eyes at that warm presence at his back. He was very tempted to just turn his head and stick his face in the guy's neck. Then his eye caught a box at the back of the drawer he had open, so he turned his attention to that instead.

Without pulling away from the other man in the slightest.

"Got some IDs here. Whole lot more than three of 'em."

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Not wanting to be left out of that, the girl balanced one hand on each guy, rising up on tip-toe to peer at the contents.

Also, they smelled nice. Sniff. Sniff. Kind of warm. And sexy. Also like cookies. Hmm.

Right, I.D's! "Alice White. Jean-Luc Kirk. Marshall Dillon?"

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"I'm guessin' you're Alice," he said. "An' I'm...Jean-Luc. Huh."

He would not have guessed that from just hearing her say the names (but he liked how she said their names. He was guessing he would like how she said a lot of things.)

"Maybe I'm from the islands?"

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"It suits you," he decided. A lot better than 'Marshall' suited him. He pulled out another passport (a British one) and flipped it open. "Nigel Throckmorten? Man, no way in hell am I British."

Just listen to him!

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'Alice' snickered, leaning in precariously closer to both guys. "Niiiigel. It's like a sleeping pill." She gave a very realistic snore, then said, "So we get to pick our names? That's cool."

Because clearly, that's what the I.D.'s were for, right? Why else would they be there? "Suzanne Hagen, Nadia Omynskaya... oo, Avery Janeway. What's a Janeway?" She eeled an arm over 'Marshall's' shoulder, then eeled it back to compare it to 'Jean-Luc.' "which do you like?"

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"Some of these names ring a bell," Jean-Luc said, frowning. He kind of found himself leaning against Marshall, while grabbing for some of the other IDs with his free hand. You know, the one that wasn't clinging to the pillow in front of his groin. "You know, this is a lot of IDs."

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'Marshall' was looking for any name that was better than 'Marshall'. And not objecting to either the arm or the leaning.

"There's definitely somethin' hinky going on here."

Ew. 'Percy' was even worse than 'Marshall'. He dug a little deeper.

"Wes Abernathy. This one at least looks pretty well used."

And apparently he wore glasses. Huh.

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Alice - or whoever - perched her chin on his shoulder, muttering "Hmmmm," next to his ear. "Wes. Wesley? Wes." Sure, why not. "Glasses are sexy. Does Jean-Luc have any glasses-Ids in there? Do I?"

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"Dr. James T. Sisko?" Jean-Luc said, pulling out another ID. He offered it to her, with his face grinning from behind a pair of glasses. "I guess we all got 'em."

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Wes looked at the MD on his ID and raised an eyebrow at Jean-Luc. "Guess we were playin' doctor?"

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Parker gave another snicker, and moved closer to James-Jean-Luc. "Doctor, I can't remember anything. Maybe you should give me an exam to check me out?" HA.

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"Hnngh." Was Jean-Luc's very suave response. He looked a little wide-eyed, unsure of what he should be doing. With his hands. Or his eyes. Or his...other parts. "I mean...uhhh. I could, uhh..."

He looked at Marshall for help.

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Wes smirked back. "Well, Doc? The lady might be in distress, here."

He thought he might be just a little bit evil.

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Just in case that wasn't clear, Alice said, "We should have sex. Again. 'Cause we forgot when we did it before, and that's a crime." She felt very sure about that statement. Like she was an FBI agent, or something. "You don't have to be a doctor! But it would be very fun. I could be a police officer, and strip-search you?" Not that there was much to strip, aside from the pillow.

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That would explain the handcuffs on the bedpost. And the nightstand. And in the closet.

The people here had a lot of different kinds of restraints.

"I, uhh, I would like that," he said. Kinda mumbled. "Cause, umm, y'all are hot. Even if I'm pretty sure we still don't actually know each other's real names. But uhh..." He looked at Alice and then at Marshall.

And then dropped the pillow.

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Wes chuckled. "Yeah, man, we'd noticed that." He looked at Alice. "So we got an officer and a doctor. What do y'all want me to be?"

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"Cowboy?" Alice said hopefully. "Orrrr a fireman? Ooooo." She bounced up on her toes, looking delighted. "Or! Construction worker!" Look, none of those had to wear a shirt, she was planning ahead!

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"Sounds like a cowboy," Jean-Luc drawled. "And he looks like he'd be good with ropes, too."

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