75 Godiva Street, Saturday morning

[vdistinctive]

It took Eliot approximately two seconds after he woke up to recognize that something was distinctly not right. He sat up slowly, noting the -- rather drastic, really -- change in his weight distribution, especially across the chest. He didn't remember straining anything working out, yesterday, or anything else that would account for any of this. And anyway, it didn't hurt. His whole body just felt . . . weird.

Which for a guy who spent his life insanely aware of his body and how it was functioning was just a little bit disconcerting.

He finally got around to opening his eyes and looking down about ten seconds after he woke up. The growled out "Dammit, Fandom," was rather higher pitched than normal, but no less deeply irritated.

Sometimes he really did hate this island.

[ooc: for those who'd be in the bed with him.]

Comments

[whoisalicewhite.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that was Parker cackling, and looking for margarita glasses. Niiiice one, Hardison.

"I'm as much of a girl as you are a girl right now," she added to Eliot. "Sometimes it's a little fun to be pretty but mostly it's a pain, and leggings don't have pockets, and finding shoes that are good for sneaking are a pain if you're male or female, so." She shrugged, and then beamed. "Hardison gets chocolate first."

Maybe bribery would help with putting Hardison in a miniskirt, too?

[vdistinctive]

Really? They thought that was going to work?

"Of course Parker can pull it off better'n I can, I'm not actually a woman." It was not a blow to Eliot's ego to not pull off wearing a miniskirt, no matter what his body was shaped like at the moment. "I don't even wear guy's shorts outside of a ring."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

They could hope! Could he really blame them for wanting to see him in a tiny skirt? With those legs?

"I think you're sellin' yourself...short," Hardison said with a grin, biting into a candy bar that Parker had brought home. "If there was any weekend for you to not do that, dontcha think it should be this one?"

[whoisalicewhite.livejournal.com]

"Aren't you even curious?" Parker wheedled, getting out some chocolate-covered almonds for herself. "Also what are you cooking, and where is your blender?"

Iced margaritas for everyone! - And a boomeranged bra to you, Eliot.

[vdistinctive]

Eliot caught the bra and pointed to a cabinet with his knife. "Blender's over there. I'm makin' bacon and pancakes." Neither of which required a paring knife. It was just comforting holding the damn thing. He set it aside and started taking his shirt off so he could pull the bra on. "And no, actually. I've never been curious about wearin' women's clothing."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"See, now I just wanna go to Baltimore an' see how many dudes hit on you like this," Hardison admitted, sitting down at the table and stretching his legs out. They didn't stretch anywhere near as far as they normally did, boo. "An' why not? Too much time spent takin' 'em off other folks? Lost all their mystique?"

[whoisalicewhite.livejournal.com]

Excuse Parker while she blends ice and tequila and some of those limes she found in the fridge.

And then stops to listen to Eliot's answer, because Curiosity.

[vdistinctive]

"What 'mystique'?" Eliot asked. "They're clothes. Damned impractical ones, at that." He shrugged, adjusting the bra straps a few times before actually reaching in and tugging his breasts up to settle them better in the cups.

Oh. That was way better. He bounced on his toes once to test, and they hardly jiggled.

"And anyway. I already tried it once."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

The chocolate bar hit the table. "Details." Hardison demanded.

[whoisalicewhite.livejournal.com]

And a slushy lime-flavored margarita for you, Hardison. Also a 32C soft cotton bra, and a sports bra, 'cause she wasn't sure how picky you were.

"When was this?" Parker asked, curious. "Was it for a job?"

Hmm. Maybe Eliot's alcohol tolerance had changed too?

[vdistinctive]

Enough of the rest of Eliot's body chemistry had changed that it was entirely likely his tolerance did, too. Which, considering he'd stayed roughly the same size over all? He hadn't thought of.

Eliot shrugged, pulling Hardison's shirt back on, but not bothering buttoning it up. "It was back in my army days. It was a quiet night on base, bunch of us got bored and kinda drunk, a couple of the women volunteered to loan us some clothes." He looked over at Hardison. "What, like you've never worn a skirt?"

[geniuswithasmartphone]

"Uhh, no, I ain't never did," Hardison admitted, looking a little embarrassed. "Unless a utilikilt counts?"

He shrugged. "I had a hard enough time bein' a skinny, geeky black kid who liked dudes from time to time. Never really thought about addin' anythin' on top of that."

[whoisalicewhite.livejournal.com]

"What's a utilikilt?" Parker poked the bag over to Hardison. "You should try on the one I got for you, too, then." To Eliot she said, "Are their pictures? And I'm putting this pitcher of frozen margaritas in the fridge for later."

And then she would have her camera ready, yup yup yup.

[vdistinctive]

"This was well before cell phone cameras, Parker," Eliot said. "And on a military base. No pictures." He shrugged. "Honestly, skirt and a kilt ain't really different. 'Cept Fandom's never stuck me in a magic miniskirt all day."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

Of course Fandom had a magical miniskirt day. Of course it did.

"Easier to show than explain," Hardison said, pulling out his phone to access the ultikilt's website. "They're popular to wear at conventions: durable, sturdy, lotsa pockets, popular. I had a couple for a few years. Might still be in a box at my Nana's, if I'm rememberin' right."

He took a long sip of his margarita. Oooh! This was good! Because drinking on an empty stomach was indeed the best plan.

[whoisalicewhite.livejournal.com]

Parker peered over his shoulder, not yet over the novelty of that. "You should wear that more often," she decided, able to rest her chin on his head. She'd poured one margarita for herself. And one for Eliot, off to the side, too. "You have nice legs whether you're a guy or not." She paused. "I might've stopped by 'Dite's to get you some other stuff too."

You know. Stuff. With extra batteries. You're welcome.

[vdistinctive]

Eliot blinked at that. And looked down.

Okay, admittedly that he was curious about.

He shook his head and started dishing out pancakes. "Sounds like you've got some ideas for the weekend, Parker."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

Hardison knocked his margarita over--and he wasn't even drunk yet. "Uhh--you did?" he asked. "You do? What kind of, umm, stuff?"

[whoisalicewhite.livejournal.com]

"There's this one thing with a tongue," Parker said, rummaging in the bag, "and then there's a couple things with batteries too. They're purple."

So much better than pink! She grinned at Eliot. "Ooo, those pancakes look good."

Time to get carbed up.

[vdistinctive]

"Sounds like I'd better make extras," Eliot noted, smirking back. "If we're gonna be that busy all day."

[geniuswithasmartphone]

For once, Hardison was not even the least bit paying attention to the food set in front of him. "So, I take it we ain't leavin' at all today?" He grinned. "You should also make somethin' quick an' easy for lunch," he decided. "Nothin' that needs warmin' up."

Just as a suggestion.

"Maybe stuff that can be fed. Just sayin'."

Loo

[whoisalicewhite.livejournal.com]

"Chocolate syrup!" Good for pancakes or people! "I stopped at the grocery store too."